Hi again. Wow, it’s been a pretty long time – I can’t believe I haven’t posted on here since Christmas!
To make up for my absence, here’s 7 days’ (give or take) worth of outfits in one post. It’s like keeping a clothes-based diary. I’ve been trying to go for a more grown up, profesh type of look lately, but also, I really need to pare down my wardrobe and try and make what I do have work for me better, so, I’m kind of hoping that this exercise will help. As you might expect it’s pretty pic heavy, apologies in advance.
Lately I seem to have gravitated back towards a more sort of vaguely vintagey secretarial femme look – the sort of saucy librarian meets standard bowlie kind of thing – that used to be my default look for several periods of my life. I think basically my style is a sort of venn diagram of goth, glam and old style ladylike schmindie nerd (for want of better terminologies), and Monday’s outfit is a good compromise between these warring factions, I reckon:
Turns out it’s quite hard to take a picture that shows off your blouse without it just being a picture of your chest. Shocking revelations, I know. Also check out my scabby messy floor yes well whatever. Realness.
I don’t know how well you can tell, but, the cardigan is saftey-pinned nearly shut in order to hide and hold back all the extra swathes of material this (Joanna Hope) blouse has got in the shoulder area. I’m going to have to take it in at some point, but I already moved the ties from the waiast to the neck so I couldn’t be arsed. I think it was meant to be a sort of voluminous beachy peasant tunic on a straight sized person (I can’t remember but I think it’s billed as a 14) which tied in at the middle, not a glamorous pussy bow blouse on a 20/22 sized top half.
Acres of extra material in the shoulderal region is something we’re going to encounter a lot in this post and those following, because I went nuts in the Modcloth 70% off sale, and bought a million billion things, almost all of which turned out to be either too big in general or just a really off shape — in most instances by making the shoulders the same size as the hips, which on the 3x or a 4x means shoulders like Gossamer the Looney Tunes monster.
Who, incidentally, I remember being strangely fascinated with as a child, and who it turns out is a lot more glamorous in some episodes than I recalled:
The cardigan is from H&M a few years ago and is too small for me now (a 16) but wevs yolo. The skirt is River Island. Satchel from a charity shop, and really knackered and falling apart.
The lipstick is Revlon but because I didn’t think this post through I can’t remember what shade. I’ll edit this when I get home after I’ve looked it up.
“Is it raining? I hadn’t noticed.”
It’s almost impressive how bad I am at taking photos of myself. Turns out the Timer Cam app is a bit unexcellent yeah? And don’t bother going for the paid version thinking it will be better, because I tried that, and if anything it’s actually worse somehow.
ANYWAY. Rain happens. And I really effing love see through plastic clothing. This coat is rubbish though because it’s really badly made and keeps coming apart at the seams because the person who made it hasn’t used any piping to join them, and it doesn’t have any buttons and does up with velcro (velcro! on a coat! really weak velcro at that!), the tie bits that are meant to tighten the (massive) hood are made of elastic for some baffling reason so obviously when you pull them they just stretch rather than pulling the hood closed, and it is essentially modelled on a dressing gown as a template as far as I can see. I bought it for £70 off ebay because it was the only plus sized plastic coat I could find at the time and the pictures made it look misleadingly legit. MORE FOOL ME. However, one surprise bonus of having to constantly sew it back together is discovering that sewing vinyl is really really easy! Who knew! I always assumed you’d need some kind of specialist needle or something and it would be really tough, but it’s fine. SO. I’m totally going to buy some plastic sheeting and some normal sewing patterns and just make everything I’ve ever wanted out of plastic and screw you high fashion bastards who think they fat girls don’t deserve unusual, interesting, out-there clothing.
Satchel as before, cardigan from H&M when I was about 20 or something and also too small as a result, dress from Modcloth (one of the few that fit perfectly and one of my new favourite items), and shoes from Doc Martens. These were horribly expensive, just, vilely so, I felt like such a twat for buying them. I love them immensely, but, in addition to that, because I’m somewhat between sizes when it comes to shoes (probably a 6 1/2 but not that many places do half sizes and when they do they seem to sell out quicker, maybe they make less of them? idk) I sized up on a gamble and wouldn’t you know it the 7 feels really loose on me, but also, I was too in love with them to send them back (they’d run out of 6s by then) so, making my own problems as usual.
I was too lazy to take photos properly so here are some really great ones of me sitting down in my office, because strip lighting is delightful. Radical visible rolls action *fist in the air*.
On a related note, surprised myself with how chestzilla I am in that last pic.
This cardigan is from M&S and is sooooooo snuggly and delicious feeling to wear. People keep stroking me because it’s so fluffy. I sometimes wear it in bed or with me jimbles or whatever because mmmm comfy. I love the colour too, sort of lilac/beige/grey — like Lime Crime’s ‘Chinchilla’ lipstick which is a really intense shade of that, it almost reminds me of viscera, which, probably says some deeply alarming things about me. I didn’t wear it on Wednesday (I wore MUA lip velvet in ‘Serene’), but here is an old pic of me wearing it with my lovely cardie (don’t worry I got it off ebay not from them direct):
The dress is an old black t-shirt material one that would probably look quite smart really on a thin person but on me always makes me feel like an old lady in a nightie. I was trying to reclaim its smart potential though so I classed it up with a belt (I have no idea where this came from, I think it was free with a dress I got off ebay?) The grey nail varnish is a result of me mixing a few different shades together in a ferrero rocher tray — which is something I like to do in general and thoroughly recommend. (see above) #obeselifestyletips
This was another nightie ish day — I don’t have any pictures because I was just phoning it in epically and genuinely forgot. Wore a black and white leopard print maxi dress from M&S which is one of my comfy but smartish summer staples, with the Asos skeleton jumper. Here are some old pics of the two items — these were the only ones I could find of either item (shout out to my boyfriend Gareth modelling my jumper).
As you can see the dress is fairly low cut, and I didn’t even notice, in my state of total phoning-it-in-ness, until I got to the office in the afternoon and took off my jumper, that I had totally forgotten to wear a bra.
Now, for those of you without large boobs, you might not realise, this is, just weird: it would be like going out without your trousers on and not realising. It just feels different and wrong. Evidence that I was totally not in touch with reality. By the time I got home my back was feeling unbrilliant I can tell you.
I don’t think you can tell with the cardie done up like that and belted in but this was sooooooo big on me, like, worn without accessories it just hung like a sack and slipped off the shoulders. Going to have to take it in. I love the pattern though, makes me look like an 80s summery bedspread (in a good way!)
Two outfits today, because I had a daytime one (went for lunch with my best friend and his boyfriend; was probs needlessly overdressed for the pub with some mates, #standard #yolo), and an evening one because Gareth was having a barbecue at our house and invited some friends over.
The first ensemble was kind of an homage to Freddie Mercury in I Want To Break Free
Jacket: Papaya, via Depop
Halter bra: ebay
Bandeau: cutting the bottom off an old t-shirt my boyfriend got given free at a local festival he worked at
Skirt: Simply Be
Lipstick: mixing Illamasqua ‘Forbidden’ with MUA ‘Serene’
Dress: Modcloth (w/ voluminous upper body/shoulders, see above)
Belt: came with a different dress, also from Modcloth
Cardigan: Gareth’s, as before
Shoes: £1 from Leeds market!
No pics mostly cause I was slightly hungover and also slouching around in my black Casiotone tee (which I love, and which I recently wore to a house gig and three different people, out of the tiny amount there, came up to me to say they had the same top — bringing socially awkward people together, hurray!) and a pair of old (plain black) leggings with holes in, with my makeup half off. I went to put the recyling out, thinking, I wont put a coat over, no-one will see me, only to be greeted by someone standing right outside my front door waiting for the neighbours to come out of theirs.
I’ve been vaguely putting off blogging for everrrrr in general, and then, last week, with regard to my academic blog, I decided enough shilly-shallying, I was going to start a New Thing in my life: #AcWriBloMo, or academic blogging month, where I got a load of my other researchery friends to commit to doing a blog a week for a month with me, because misery (well, laziness and stage-fright anyway) loves company! And in addition to this, it occured to me after I had set the plan in motion, I could use this to get my momentum back on other blog projects as well – such as like this one here, for instance.
Thank you for joining me on this long meandering account of my week’s wardrobe. Apologies that it has been so pic heavy, and that so many of them are ~bad or whatever. But the thing is, I thought about this quite a lot, and I realised that if I kept worrying about either me or the pictures looking appropriately styled and fashiony etc, first of all I would never post anything and my hiatus would just go on and on, and secondly, it would just be buying into that whole you’re never good enough, you always have to be perfect, you can’t show what you’re _really_ like etc — so, here is the real me, multiple chins, bags under eyes, sweet wrappers on the floor, messy bedroom, bad lighting, dodgy blog layout, blurriness and all. No filters, no spanx, just a fat woman who loves clothes, existing in public and not letting ~society stop her.
I’m planning on keeping up this outfit of the day type record, because, I think it really will help me buy less but also be less lazy about fixing/altering etc all the stuff I have already that I keep not being arsed to improve. All being well, I plan to do a fatshion blog one a week this coming month as well as a (semi)academic one. They wont necessarily be weekly OOTD type roundups, like this one, and if anyone reading this has any suggestions for themes or stuff they would like to see me wearing then go ahead and let me know.